Girl Myths

The boys’ favorite show is Myth Busters. I’m not sure but there maybe could be an entire MythBusters channel. It doesn’t matter if I’ve been watching a show for a long time….actively engaged, talking back to the TV set, etc., if I get up, if only for a second, the minute I return to the family room the show MythBusters is blaring away.

I’m also pretty sure there are only five episodes of MythBusters. Why would they need to create anymore? If a whole bunch of guys are willing to watch the same explosions, the same flames, the same MacGyver reminiscent experiments over and over…more power to them.

Last week I caught a ride to Joplin with a coworker and we were enjoying a couple of seconds of silence from our early morning chat-fest when the bell on her low gas indicator binged.

“Dang,” she said, “now we have to get gas. I heard the bell. If we had still been talking it would have rang, I would have missed it and we would have made it fine to work. But now we have to stop.”

We laughed when I related that my “GirlMyth” recording a low gas tank was seeing the gas tank icon on my dash glow yellow. I swear I could drive another 100 miles…running on fumes, if only I hadn’t seen the light.

This got me to thinking about other GirlMyths I know well. Here goes. Let me know if you have some I’ve failed to mention.

GirlMyth #2 – You can cram anything, and I do mean anything, down your garbage disposal. As long as you ram it down there fast and especially important is that you’re husband cannot be home during the event. (So far, so good. I’m about 127 to 1 on having this one work. It’s just that the one failed attempt was a little expensive.)

GirlMyth #3 – In the winter it really doesn’t matter how long you let the hair on your legs grow. Simply walk with confidence and wear dark pantyhose. I’m relatively sure everyone will think you’re just sporting some awesome textured hose.

GirlMyth #4 – Drippy faucets, running toilets, squeaking brakes will miraculously heal themselves if you only ignore them long enough. (It helps if the offending appliance is in a room where you can shut the door.)

GirlMyth #5 – A happy meal and a diet Coke = 0 calories. (This is one of my personal favorites.)

GirlMyth #6 – Those once infamous, hard to miss tabloid-screaming headlines regarding spontaneous combustion are actually very easily to explain cases of midlife hot flashes combined with extended pantyhose use. (See #3)

GirlMyth #7 – Any illness can be cured with Benadryl. At the very least, you or they will sleep well and thereby miss the constant sniffing and hacking.

Maybe next season the MythBusters guys will take on one of my seven wonders of the girl world. That is if they think they can handle it.